This is what starting over looks like…

michelleshaffer29's avatarthefaithfulheart

547334_325968817480082_1602908993_nSo they say that rock bottom is a beautiful place to start, or restart in my case… to begin again and get a clean slate with endless possibilities. I guess that is where I am at today… this is my rock bottom. I have to admit I have been here a few times before and it never feels any better. You never see it coming no matter how experienced you become at feeling that rough, cold ground beneath you…  no, somehow it still manages to sneak up on you every time.

Luckily, I believe in new beginnings. I believe in the fall. I believe in failing so miserably and painfully into yourself. I believe in breaking every bone into the person you are meant to become. Yes, I am a fan of those growing pains. I am sure you are wondering if I am some kind of masochist here and maybe I…

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The truth hurts.

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You want me to paint you a pretty picture? Most people will be satisfied with just that, a superficial truth that they believe. They reach out to all those who will agree with them and tell them exactly what they want to hear.

But that’s so easy to find, you get sucked back into your old ways and seek comfort in the ways of the world. We have all been there, I know I have. But many will be there for a long time. All because they are too prideful to face the truth.

I just cant, I know the truth and I can’t pretend anymore that I don’t. I  will do my best to live by it. Sure, I will fail, but I won’t turn back. I’ve done that one too many times.

I won’t judge you for where you are on your walk with God. But if I love you, I will call you out on the sins that seperate you from Him. Because isn’t that exactly what God calls us to do?

But if the way I live and the changes I make, the things I say and do make you uncomfortable, because you feel pressured and restricted then you need to do some soul searching.

That pressure is not me, it’s God. Nudging, I am but a messenger and I will never pressure anyone to do anything, not even my son.  But I also won’t let anyone stand in my way. You can live a lie, you can fool a lot people, but not me and most definitely not God!